Great ER Quotes

What follows is a number of quotes heard while working in the ER that I have found entertaining/thought-provoking. Enjoy!

“You don’t even understand graham crackers.”- Psych patient. No, I don’t.

“They just need to go home and be sick at home,” exasperated physician in the pediatric ER.
“I shot a guys genitals off for raping my sister.” Eesh.
“No [...]

One patient, many quotes

Here are some actual quotes from a patient I saw recently:
“I’ve died several times.”

“I thought I was I bipolar but I’m not. I wish I was.”

“I had an IQ higher than Einstein.”

“My whole family almost died from Anthrax.”
All from one patient within about 5 minutes. That was a fun day.